Reasons To Love Sly Stallone

Sylvester Stallone
Our eclectic team of writers from around Australia – and a couple beyond – with decades of combined experience and interest in all fields.

Death Starrs are Syntax and Mules, the star-crossed Gold Coast / Melbourne duo best known for winning the Hilltop Hoods remix competition. Well, that and their love of '80s action hero Sylvester Stallone. They provided five reasons why Sly's their guy.

1. Windswept, moody and enigmatic hair

Rambo bucked the trends and kept the perm well into the naughties – it must’ve been a confusing sight for an enemy to be attacked on a rickety bamboo bridge by a walking catwalk ready hairdo with muscles attached. But this is why Sly is awesome; he don’t follow no trend, yo.

2. Political indifference

Lemme set the scene — ‘Rambo III’; one man singlehandedly fighting off a Russian invasion in pre-Taliban Afghanistan, allying with the very same rebels that America has now spent 11 years trying to unhinge with great loss of life. Rambo’s war is internal and follows no political allegiance. Awesome.

3. Rocky

The greatest underdog story every told — it gave Italians a reason to hit the gym, get a tan and ultimately lead to Jersey Shore, a show that gives millions of people pleasure as they thank god they never turned out like those morons.

4. Physics

As a kid I learned it was possible to destroy a helicopter with a bow and arrow, date a woman called ‘Adrian’ without my sexuality being brought into question, and turn common bed springs into a torture device. Physics.

5. Brigitte Nielsen

Sly was once married to Brigitte Nielsen, a woman so pragmatic and confused she also dated Flavor Flav. I don’t know any other actor to have shared such an, err, intimate space, with rap royalty.

Death StarrsDownload Death Starrs' 'Immortal', the first taste of their forthcoming LP, here.

The Expendables 2 is released on DVD and Blu-Ray on December 28.

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