The Brokini – Questionable Beach Attire You Can't Unsee

The Brokini
Our eclectic team of writers from around Australia – and a couple beyond – with decades of combined experience and interest in all fields.

Two Toronto bros have launched The Brokini – and it's pretty much exactly what it sounds like.


Chad Sasko and Taylor Field are behind the creation, which does all it can to accentuate all the right areas, and is reminiscent of that famous 'Borat' moment we definitely didn't forget about. Yikes.

"We excelled in high school and found classes to be a joke. We therefore didn’t develop any work or study ethic and spent most of our time playing hacky sack and sword fighting with meter sticks," the founders say on their site.

"We were both perfectly mediocre and that is why we are stuck running a business that has thus far made -$5,326.87."

Brokini 2
Image - brokinis.com

"We hope to one day grow Brokinis enough to cover our MASSIVE cryptocurrency losses and hire a golden retriever as a receptionist, but we have no idea how to run a business so that seems pretty unlikely at this point. We like dogs and strawberry daiquiris and the Toronto Maple Leafs."

Sure it might seem like this is all a complete joke, but trust us – it's not. Brokinis are legit, and available to purchase.

Brokini 3
Image - brokinis.com

They come in two fabulous patterns – Bromingo and Fineapple. And if the names of those patterns weren't enough to sell you, perhaps the product description will:

"The perfect swimwear to make your parents question where they went wrong. Premium materials and stitching, shoulder sling draws attention to your dong, makes even small weenies look schmedium."

Still not convinced? How about this stellar, five-star product review from Taylor's mum: "Taylor I wish you would stop wearing stuff like that. It's so weird"

Spring is almost here – time to whip out the Brokini.

Let's Socialise

Facebook pink circle    Instagram pink circle    YouTube pink circle    YouTube pink circle

 OG    NAT

Twitter pink circle    Twitter pink circle