Top 5 Public Toilets To Exchange Private Words

Public Toilets, Private Words
Past Arts and Comedy Editor
Jess was scenestr National Arts and Comedy editor between 2014 and 2017.

Fresh from the Melbourne International Comedy Festival, ‘Public Toilets, Private Words’ is a chuckle (and an awkward squirm) at toilet graffiti-inspired cabaret.


Set in nightclub toilet stalls around the world, the show has turned the drunken rants, earnest musings and crude invitations from graffiti into hilarious stories and surprisingly catchy tunes. A crowd favourite at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival, the Brisbane Powerhouses ‘Wonderland’ showcase will deliver more of Brisbane’s best stall scralls.

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The show’s Creative Producer and performer, Eloise Maree says that it’s essential to know where to go when you’ve “gotta drop your slacks”. “There are a range of options out there, from classy to entertaining.” Here are her top choices:

Ric's toilets, Fortitude Valley

There are endlessly entertaining scribbles from drunken hipsters in these small, usually partly-broken loos. Guaranteed to entertain while business is done! They've even let us do a shoot or two in there for the show, so we are very fond of these latrines.

Queens Plaza, Brisbane City

These are personal favourites of mine. Downstairs at Queens Plaza are marble-clad water closets that are kept immaculately clean. This is a classy stop over, well worth the extra hike even if you’re on the other side of the city. Hell, the next suburb. A rare gem in public loo land.

Woodford Folk Festival, Woodford

These smelly drop boxes are well entertaining as they are covered with messages urging you to a) save the world b) spread love or even c) climb a mountain with a lobster as your accomplice. Love might not be what you're spreading after a big night out at Woodie, but these thrones are a guaranteed giggle.

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Press Club, Fortitude Valley

The girls toilets here are fantastic – the middle cubicle is designed for two ladies to pee side by side, to you know, gossip about all the babes trying desperately to buy you a drink in this well-designed but essentially seedy establishment. Also handy is the marble separator between the two comfort stations, it's smooth top designed for whatever your imagination may come up with.

Kawakawa, New Zealand

These are the ultimate public johns – even having been awarded the prestigious ‘Golden Plunger’. They are designed by artist, Friedensreich Hundertwasser (pronouncing his name is the hardest part) and feature a glass roof, a tree, sculptures, handmade tiles... an inspired restroom for inspired travellers.

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‘Public Toilets, Private Words’ plays at the Brisbane Powerhouse’s ‘Wonderland’ on the 11th and 14th December. ‘Wonderland’ runs from the 3rd to the 14th December.

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