Nazeem Hussain has accomplished a bucketload of stuff over the last year or so.
It's been a big one. Sketch show airing, Netflix special streaming, and his new role as a dad.
Luckily that means the comedian has a lot to reflect on in the best way he knows how – through comedy.
Here, Nazeem has a chat about what to expect in his new show 'Basic Idiot'.
Congratulations on becoming a dad! What is something you’ve learned since having that happen for you?
The biggest lesson I’ve learnt as a dad, is to close my mouth when changing my son’s nappy. Cos otherwise he’ll piss in my mouth. That’s basically it. Also, all the corny stuff you hear new parents say, like 'your heart grows the second your child is born' and 'I would literally kill someone if they messed with my child' is all true. I feel homicidal at the thought of someone waking my son up after spending two hours trying to put him down.
Where do you draw the line when it comes to jokes about your child?
At the moment, there is no line. I just watch him all day with the ‘notes’ app open, waiting for him to do stuff that’s joke material worthy. But at the moment, he’s not yet saying words, so I’m really just limited to jokes about sleeping, starting solids and projectile s..tting. Not as much bang for buck as I was hoping. But I’m confident this investment will pay off. Just wait for my 2022 tour.
Nah my kid is more than a comedy prop. He’s also great for getting those ‘parents with pram’ car spaces.
You’ve also had your sketch show ‘Orange Is The New Brown’ air on Channel 7… What was that like?
That was such a dream! I got to work with my favourite Aussie comedians, and Urzila Carlson, whatever she is. I absolutely love making sketch comedy. And to have them broadcast on Channel 7 at prime time was something I don’t think was supposed to happen in Australia for many decades. Though, I now have people constantly yelling at me on the street “Hey! Orange man!”, which is better than 'black ….!' I guess. Perhaps that’s an indication of the show ending racism?
So clearly this new show ‘Basic Idiot’ will be about these things and much more… Where did you begin when it came to putting the content for it together?
My shows tend to be a collection of stories and opinions I’ve been carrying around in my head for the past 12 months. It seems people like hearing me talk about unfortunate things that happen to me. People pay to laugh at my misfortune. And I’m happy with that? There’s something wrong with me.
Why did you call the show ‘Basic Idiot’?
Because I’m basic. And I’m an idiot.
Have you had any particularly strange/out-of-the-ordinary things happen to you recently that are worth mentioning?
On my Netflix special (now streaming), I told a story about a guy in Queensland who advertised a room for rent online, specifying that he did not want “Indians, backpackers or Muslims”. I jokingly gave out his number. Obviously, it was a fake number. A 12 digit number. Aussie numbers are only 10 digits long. So when Netflix people asked if it’s a fake number, I said “of course!”. Turns out, if you dial that number… It connects to a real Australian number before you get to dial the last two digits. Unfortunately, over a thousand people from around the world have called this very lovely woman living in Canberra asking to rent out her room. Netflix have finally bleeped out her number, and I am really sorry for using my comedy powers for evil.
What is your favourite thing about touring?
Living out of a suitcase and being away from my family. It’s so much fun being lonely. Also, I enjoy asking people on Instagram to give me local tips, and then disregarding all of those tips to just get Maccas or a kebab.
And least favourite?
Oh, I answered this in the last question.
This is your fifth solo show. What do you think is the biggest change from your first to this one?
Me. I’m five years older, and hopefully – five years better at stand up. Or so I hope.
Nazeem Hussain Tour Dates
4-10 March – The Factory at The Garden of Unearthly Delights (Adelaide Fringe)28 March-21 April – Melbourne Town Hall (Melbourne International Comedy Festival)
4 May – Regal Theatre (Perth Comedy Festival)
18 May – Enmore Theatre (Sydney Comedy Festival)
