Comedian Emma Malik Pens An Open Letter To Animals

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The UK's Emma Malik doesn't just do stand-up – she's an animal expert, too.


Armed with her reputation for 'training the untrainable', Emma will debut the live version of her web series 'Celebrities Patting Animals' as part of Sydney Comedy Festival.

The series has delighted audiences for two seasons with guests including Rove McManus, 'SNL''s Jay Pharoah, comedy megastar Kanan Gill, 'The Conan O'Brian Show''s Ron Funches and 'Dancing With The Stars' Celia Pacquola. . . So who knows who'll be joining Emma for the live outing?!

The show will be a special fundraiser for the Wildlife Conservation Fund, to continue their work supporting care and conservation of Australian native animals including those affected by bushfires and drought.

Ahead of the live debut of 'Celebrities Patting Animals' (where Emma will be joined by her sidekicks Thai rescue dog DukDik and rescue chihuahua Gecko), she pens an open letter, fittingly, to animals.

“Dear animals,

Firstly, let me just say I rate you higher than people.

Some of you get a hard time in the media – I'm talking to you snakes but since I've gotten to know you, I realise that you're just noodles with teeth.



Because all animals are awesome, I've decided to do a show where we celebrate you and what better way to celebrate than to let you poop on celebrities! When you do poop on the celebrities, don't forget to make eye contact with them – they love that.

We're going to work together and raise money for all those Aussie animals who are doing it tough in the wild, so put on your cute faces and try not to hump the humans. I'll make sure you have plenty of snacks and water and that you are happy during the show. Try not to eat the celebrities' snacks, they might bite you.

Animals, us humans need you more than ever, so let's work together to make this a fun night for all and let the humans understand that even the smallest of you deserve a moment to shine!

See you at the show!

Emma”


Emma Malik plays Factory Theatre (Sydney Comedy Festival) 1-2 May.

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