5 Ways To Demonstrate Excellent Manners: Goodie Two Shoes At Adelaide Fringe

Peter Hart has nice manners and always will, but when his new job -accidentally- turns him into a gangland criminal, he must deliberately offend nasty men to survive.

But why rock the boat? Here, Peter (James McLean) lists five ways to demonstrate excellent manners in preparation for his show 'Goodie Two Shoes' at Adelaide Fringe.

Smile politely

This is a no-brainer. No matter what you do, do it with a pleasant, non-threatening smile. Job interview? Smile politely. Random breath test? Smile politely. Dealing with a customer who just won’t leave you alone? Smile very politely. It’s important to keep your polite smile genuine but not over-the-top. You don’t want to look like you’ve been waiting too long for someone to take a photograph.

Use euphemisms

No one wants to confront certain ugly truths in life. So let them off the hook by using polite euphemisms in conversation. You’re not “going to the toilet” you’re “going to the bathroom”; your grandfather didn’t “die”, he “passed away”; Davidson at the office wasn’t “fired unexpectedly, leaving him totally unable to support his family”, he was “let go to release his talents back into the marketplace”.

Be gracious

Be effusive with thanks when presented with a new opportunity or gift. Even if deep down you suspect it might be a bit crap, be sure to tell the gifter how amazing, practical and useful their gift is. Tell your boss how much you’re looking forward to taking on your new position, which sounds a bit like an excuse to double your workload with a negligible pay increase. Smile politely.

Be non-confrontational

Has a co-worker just taken credit for all of your hard work? Do you want to go over to their desk and start screaming at them, pointing your finger really hard at them and throwing their stuff out the window? Easy there tiger. That doesn’t sound like good manners. Sure, it was rude of them to take credit for your work but you can be the better person and just let it slide. Karma will come back and bite them on the butt. Probably. Maybe. Perhaps.

Think before you speak

If you have no filter in social situations, you’re likely to say something inappropriate, impolite, or even offensive. To avoid accidentally blurting out something rude or thoughtless, think about what you’re about to say first. Assess every other person in the conversation; what is their background? What is their relationship to you? What is their socio-economic standing? By the time you’ve done this, the conversation will have moved on and you will have ensured no one took what you said the wrong way because you never said it. Smile politely.

'Goodie Two Shoes' plays Noel Lothian Hall at Adelaide Botanic Garden from 17 February-18 March.